Arjun Desai

View Original

Comfort vs. Counsel

There have been a few stumbles this year. And times when I’ve been totally knocked down. It’s only natural in the rhythm of life. But still painful nevertheless.

When you’re stuck at the bottom, there’s no shame in reaching out for help. You would move mountains for your loved ones too.

But before I ask for or give support, I love this thought exercise: “Do I/they need comfort or counsel?” In many cases, providing answers can be ineffectual. Most times we already know the answer; it’s just hard to bear right now. Asking the question directly can match our best intent with what they need.

For the majority of cases, starting with comfort can actually be the most caring. The power of “I hear you, I see you, and I’m with you.” is extraordinary. This a reminder to myself to remember to soothe, before starting to solve.