Pieces of Me

I was thinking of a quotation Michelle Obama referenced in her book The Light We Carry.

It was a quote about friendship from novelist Toni Morrison, paraphrased here: “Friendship takes the pieces of me and gives them back in the right order.”

What a beautiful sentiment. A good friend can accept whatever version of you shows up — no matter how messy. And they’ll quietly sit with you, unpacking everything piece by piece, until you feel sorted again.

It’s a blessing to be loved like that. Grateful for those in my corner! 🙏

BoD

I was reflecting this week on having a personal board of directors (BoD). Every corporation has a board to guide the CEO and steer the company to success. Can it be applied to personal life?

A group of trusted loved ones who provide advice, share unconditional support, and challenge your thinking. And of course, celebrate your wins and recognize successes!

All in service to help you become the best version of yourself. If you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go together. Who’s on your board? 🤝

XXXV

I turn 35 today! A good moment to reflect on the midpoint of my thirties. Endless gratitude for what this life has given me so far.

35 in numerology encourages creative exploration, embracing change, and enjoying life’s adventures.

Some reflections entering this year:

  • Remember yourself. As I get older, I am spending more time noticing—noticing what lifts me up, what pulls me down, where my energy crests and falls.  Demands and forces only grow from here, so a question: what am I doing to return to center? Am I living my truth?

  • Some kind of wonderful. I am excited to marry Tanvi in a few months. Not only because she’s lovely in so many ways; but also simply because we have a wonderful friendship—filled with equal parts silly and serious. What a beautiful treat to come home to a partner where you can just “be”. A reminder to protect this space and keep it safe.

  • All we need. When the dust settles, what we needed was not far from home. A sound body, a calm mind, and a house full of love. After that, it’s cherries and whipped cream. So in moments of stress, despair or doubt—I need to ask myself: what am I really chasing?

As always, I am forever thankful for those on the road with me. Y’all make the moments magic 🪄 To many more years together!

Mastery

I’ve been thinking about some of my all-time greats: Buffett, Spielberg, Jordan, Angelou.

Masters of their craft. Pouring decades to reach the peak of achievement. All are meticulous about practice, discipline, and learning.

To become a master, I often return to the idea of flow state. When you’re focused, energized, and immersed— skills can exponentially catalyze. Total absorption: where you lose track of time because you can’t help yourself.

For my goals, I want to continue to find pockets to harness this. Where have you found your flow?

Gravity Problems

When I face thorny issues, so much of my time and energy goes to: “How does this happen?"

I’m learning to shift gears to “Is it in my control?” Difficult lesson to practice. The universe is random & erratic; it’s a fool’s errand to feel like we can exert influence.

I liked this framing from two Stanford professors—Dave Evans and Bill Burnett—in their book Designing Your Life on gravity problems.

“Gravity problems” are obstacles or contrary forces you can’t do anything about. “If it’s not actionable, it’s not a problem; it’s a circumstance.”

Gravity is immutable; we can’t disrupt it, we can only work with. And it takes grace & humility to realize many problems are the same. Remembering the serenity prayer!

Time Well Spent

I was having coffee with my friend and former colleague, Maria, and we were chatting about our work. She’s taken an amazing role as a design leader at a healthcare startup.

She mentioned working extra hours to meet the demands of her job. I was curious how she was managing it all while avoiding burnout.

Maria had such a beautiful way of framing it: “Yes, it’s a lot of time, but it’s time well spent.”

That stuck with me. We sometimes view work and play as separate entities, assuming we only derive joy from the latter. But time will pass regardless—no matter the category.

It’s a good reminder to assess our most precious, finite resource: Am I spending my time well? If not, how can I reclaim it?

Forgettable Wednesdays

Happy Valentine’s Day! I’m reminded of a post by one of my favorite writers, Tim Urban, about choosing the right life partner.

“If we want to find a happy marriage, we need to think small. It’s built not out of anything poetic, but out of 20,000 mundane Wednesdays. Marriage isn’t the honeymoon in Thailand—it’s day four of vacation #56 that you take together. Marriage is not celebrating the closing of the deal on the first house—it’s having dinner in that house for the 4,386th time. Marriage is Forgettable Wednesday. Together.”

A beautiful sentiment. Yes, milestones are wonderful, but what truly matters is everything that comes before, during, and after—the 20,000 days in between. Making the ordinary feel extraordinary. Delight in the dullness.

So what does Urban see as the key ingredients to this magic?

  • An Epic Friendship – The best relationships are effortlessly fun, stimulating, and make you crave more time together.

  • A Feeling of Home – A great partnership feels safe, natural, and built on trust and acceptance.

  • Determination – Success requires effort, communication, equality, and healthy conflict resolution.

For those with partners—or those still searching for the right one—I hope your Wednesdays are just as special as the big days. 🩵

Isn't it amazing?

My health & fitness journey has been a winding road.

Some weeks, I can feel extraordinarily powerful — ready to take on anything! Other weeks, I feel shriveled and worn out — ready to…stay in bed.

Managing the oscillations has taken over a decade, and I still have a long way to go. I recently saw a video from a creator I follow.

He references the idea of gratitude during a workout, repeating, “Isn’t it amazing…”

  • Isn’t it amazing… I can move my body now — so I can hike when I’m 70.

  • Isn’t it amazing… I can lift heavy things now — so I can carry my kids when I’m 50.

  • Isn’t it amazing… I can eat clean now — so I can have energy throughout the week.

It reinforces the idea I often think about: “I have to” → “I get to.” Health is such a privilege and blessing; I need to always appreciate how my body works hard to keep me alive.

Staying Power

I listened to a ‘How I Built This’ podcast about Bombas — a company that has redefined a forgotten category: socks.

It was a fantastic episode in which the co-founders, David Heath and Randy Goldberg, shared reflections on how they started the company. They have now grown it to a quarter-billion-dollar business.

One incredible part of Bombas is its commitment to giving back. For every sock you buy, Bombas donates an extra pair to those in need. That's 150 million items to over 3,500 community organizations—pretty incredible.

Their value-driven mission (apart from building a durable business) made me think of the idea of staying power. Heath & Goldberg shared that during Covid - their business went from 50% growth to -12% growth. Flooded with worry, they were wondering how the team would respond. Something else happened:

“Probably one of the proudest moments I've ever had as a leader was when shut the office down the office [from Covid]; by Monday, everything was up and running. It rallied us. This is where the mission comes back. It became this moment where we can step up and distribute socks [to the community].”

What an awesome story! The whole company was lifted because of a broader purpose, and it thrives today because of that. It wasn’t just a fast success, but a lasting success.

Giving Up ≠ Stopping

I finished Shoe Dog this week. An awesome memoir that chronicles the journey of Nike’s co-founder Phil Knight on the path to build a global sportswear empire.

Given the heights Nike has reached, it was humbling to see Knight’s early struggles and bold decisions. For many years, things were hanging in a balance — precarious to fall apart any moment.

Near the end of the book, there’s a reflection that Phil writes that hits home:

“And those who urge entrepreneurs to never give up? Charlatans. Sometimes you have to give up. Sometimes knowing when to give up, when to try something else, is genius. Giving up doesn't mean stopping. Don't ever stop.”

We have come a long way to destigmatize missteps and setbacks: remembering you didn’t fail, you just fell.

And if a hard fall feels like giving up for a bit, that’s okay too. Life is long, and everyone needs a pivot or rest. I’m continuing to internalize this: 1% is better than 0% — as long as you continue to wake up and face the day.

Someone Else's Bowl

My Amma shared this lovely quotation with our family: “The only time you should look in someone else’s bowl is to see if they have enough.”

It’s very easy to compare what we have to others. Even if we may be happy, we steal glances at what others have — their life, home, and wardrobe. It can cause spiraling thoughts, even for a moment.

It’s fitting that my Amma shared this with us. She believes deeply in service and has dedicated her life to giving, from small efforts like checking in on elders to large work with non-profits. 

Amma has nurtured this idea in all of us: “How can you pay it forward?” That’s why this phrase resonates so deeply—moving from “How can I get that?” to “How can I help them?”

Because of her lasting love of others, so many bowls have been filled. 🥣

Along the way

One of my favorite writers on LinkedIn, Amber Naslund, shared a lovely quotation to start the year. It’s a longer one, but worth the read in full.

“As you journey through life, choose your destinations well, but do not hurry there. You will arrive soon enough.

Wander the back roads and forgotten paths, keeping your destination in your heart like the fixed point of a compass. Seek out new voices, strange sights, and ideas foreign to your own. Such things are riches for the soul.

And, if upon arrival, you find that your destination is not exactly as you had dreamed, do not be disappointed.

Think of all you would have missed but for the journey there, and know that the true worth of your travels lies not in where you come to be at the journey’s end, but who you came to be along the way.” ~ Unknown

We know the classic line of life is the journey, not the destination.

I liked how this quotation explained why the journey matters. The discovery of yourself is the true gift, not where you ended or how far you went. 

And the only way to do that is to wander, roam, and reflect.

Source: Wait But Why

Radical Doability

Happy 2025! My dad shared a great essay for setting goals: Radical Doability.

We tend to make sweeping plans for the new year—to get washboard abs or become fluent in Spanish. Totally okay to dream big, but it can be quite daunting and overwhelming.

The author encourages micro achievements with fewer goals. Choose a maximum of 2. And then invest in habits + systems that allow for flexibility (e.g., a 5-minute walk after dinner or doing your daily Duolingo lesson.)

Let go of the pressure to do too much. Ask yourself what changes you’d genuinely enjoy rather than chasing what you think you “should” do. Remember the words you use for your identity: “I work out sometimes → I am a fit person trying to get better.”

“From the perspective of radical doability, the most thrilling plans you could imagine mean nothing, compared with the extraordinary power of actually doing something, however imperfect.”

So let’s shift from lofty plans of reinvention; instead, embrace the power of simply doing a few things differently.

Because you lived

To my Dadaji, happy 89th birthday! There’s so much love because you lived.

Sonder

I heard a word that I liked: Sonder.

Sonder is a term coined by John Koenig in his book The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows.

It refers to the profound realization that every person you encounter is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—filled with their own dreams, struggles, and routines.

Appreciate that others have their own story unfolding, even if you’re just a small part of their day. Interconnected, yet distinct.

And it connects so well to the famous quote: “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle…”

Learn. Earn. Return.

I recently saw Gladiator 2 — which featured the iconic Denzel Washington. At almost 70, his gravitas is unmatched.

I saw a great video of him sharing life advice over a five decade career.

“First part of your life, you learn. Second part of your life, you earn. And third part of life, you return.”

Beautifully said. The first two heuristics I’ve heard before, but loved the last one:

  • Learn: In the early years, be a relentless sponge and soak as much you can from people who’ve done.

  • Earn: In the middle years, invest in mastery and negotiate to be paid fairly and commensurate to all your experience.

  • Return: In the later years, leave it better than you found it. Give yourself back to your community — and pay it forward with mentorship, money and time.

Wisdom to remember for a long time!

All we need

Happy Thanksgiving! I watched a sports documentary, The Starting Five (awesome show!), and I enjoyed how different teams rally each other in the huddle.

This one made me smile: “All we got. All we need.” For me, it meant that if we have people who care for us — even if they are few — then it’s a gift to cherish.

That’s why this season of holidays matters so much. A time to feel grateful for the abundance already in our lives — a sound body, a calm mind, and a house full of love.

Couch Friends

This weekend, I was talking to my good friend Anuj about friendship. We shared perspectives on building networks away from home — he in LA and I in NYC.

Entering our mid-30s, we lamented how difficult it was to meet—feeling like a jigsaw puzzle to coordinate schedules. And if you do meet with new people, the conversation can be stilted. No one is perfectly comfortable…yet.

It made us both appreciate what we coined “couch friends.” Put another way - it’s those relationships that feel like no-brainers. You simply have to text: “Want to chill?” They come over, sit on your couch, and chit-chat.

That’s it. No prep. No scheduling. And it feels amazing.

Hope we can find that — no matter where we go!

Leave it Behind

As we enter the holiday season, it’s a blessing to have the extra time to reflect.

You start to take stock of your past year and start thinking about the next year. One concept I’ve been thinking about is how precious our one life is.

We can take our soul but leave behind everything else: every cent we earned and every object we bought.

So, knowing that it all goes zero, is our time well spent?