I had a work scenario this week that had some tension. I dropped the ball on a project with a colleague, leaving a sour taste in our mouths. I decided to meet with this person.

I took them for a coffee, shared an apology, and built a plan forward. I felt we both left that conversation with trust.

What helped me was a tip I heard from a leader. You can listen, but don’t forget to hear. Tell them what you heard.

Listening is receiving, but hearing is processing. In this situation, I received feedback when we met. Rather than jumping to respond, I tried saying: “Here’s what I’m hearing: A, B, C. Is that right?”

It did a few things: I could honor the feedback properly and process it by saying it aloud. Then shift to tactics to move forward. A healthier feedback loop to get to a growth mindset.